Growth Can Be Dangerous

I  read the following excellent quote on Eddie Two Hawks the other day.  It really got me thinking. Just a quick share of some of the thoughts I had.

“The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.”

Some Thoughts:

* The absolute luxury of individuality causing you to live under the misconception that you’re beholden to none.
* Becoming conscious and growing as a person happens at differing times and levels in people; therefore the need for patience with one another
* The fact that relationships can break down if one person outgrows the other
* What is the extent of the responsibility to stay in a relationship where the one outgrows the other
* The danger of self-righteousness.


About Don

I love life. Sometimes it makes sense, other times not. Discerning its underlying patterns and beauty always provides great reward and meaning and is a passion I ineptly follow. I feel deeply attached to nature and love the sea with its distinct moods and colour and find walking along its beaches wonderfully inspiring. Writing, sketching and photography is a sheer joy for me and the blog is one of the places I am able to express these pursuits.
This entry was posted in collectivity and individuality, inspiration, Life, Relationships, Spirituality, Transformation, wisdom and insight and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

29 Responses to Growth Can Be Dangerous

  1. Hariod Brawn says:

    . . . and one of you always loses their keys. 😉

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Susan Feniak says:

    Food for thought indeed.


  3. Val Boyko says:

    Being patient and accepting goes hand in hand with having close relationships…
    As we grow, we become more aware of this…
    Traveling alone can be a lonely path…

    Liked by 2 people

    • Don says:

      So true what you say about patience and acceptance, Val. I suppose in one sense, to a degree, we are all alone. I wonder if it isn’t both. Some things can only be embarked upon alone, but if it comes out of the strength and comfort of relationship one approaches that journey with a deeper confidence and strength.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Val Boyko says:

        Being in relationship or not is a choice that we all have. Yes, there are things to embark on alone, but there is comfort in love when there is someone close who cares.
        Is “growth” really a good thing (most of us assume it is). Perhaps caring and acceptance of others just the way they are is the true gift.

        Liked by 2 people

  4. nrhatch says:

    My thoughts took a more literal turn ~ thinking about a trip I took by myself my senior year in college and how great it felt to be able to “turn on a dime.” Since I was the only one who had a vote about the agenda, I could be spontaneous. No need to seek a “group consensus” about where to go and what to do. Just do it.

    Of course, the absolute freedom of being beholden to no one didn’t last ~ I met lots of people on the trip. As soon as we made plans for dinner or cocktails or boat rides, I went from “being alone” to “traveling with others” . . . and waiting for them to get ready. :mrgreen:

    Liked by 1 person

    • Don says:

      Thanks for that Nancy. Really enjoyed what you said. It reminded me of a journey I made alone in the sixties. I just got in to my little VW Beetle and started to drive. Over the months I ended up in numerous places. Of course, like you, it never lasted – back to community and a sense of responsibility for others. However, I will always remember the exhilaration and sense of freedom in the moment and the period that followed. In fact, it had a profound effect on the shaping of my life.

      Liked by 3 people

      • nrhatch says:

        Your trip sounds great.

        That feeling of being “unfettered” is rare these days ~ too many tangled webs tugging on our sleeves. But I still like cranking the radio when “Born To Be Wild” comes on!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Dan Antion says:

    Deep thinking ahead Don. I’m drawn to “when does the whole become greater than the sum of the parts?”


  6. Really good questions Don. When I think of marriage (and I’m not married so…) I can’t help thinking how those vows seem to have meant more back in the day (at its best encouraging couples to resolve their issues, at its worst holding people in abusive relationships) Maybe it all depends on motive?? Thanks for this thought-provoking post. ❤
    Diana xo

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Bill says:

    The question is the definition of outgrow. After 46 years of the ups and downs my love and appreciation and the desire to wait just to be together is beyond words. Great thought provoking blog Don!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. calvin says:

    First thought, the definition of growth I find somewhat mind boggling.

    Growth can be dangerous, yes. But what is fatal to any relationship be it personal, professional, artistically the connection between jealousy and insecurity, with lack of meaningful compassion tossed in. Best one can do, is seek out like-minded, but there are no guarantees. Failure in relationships is not necessarily as catastrophic as we might believe.


  9. QP and Eye says:

    Th point about one person outgrowing the other is something I return to again and again. I feel there’s a responsibility to understand the other’s reticence to evolve; understand the barriers as well as the challenges for that person. My thinking has been if one leaves the other behind long enough to have outgrown them then one has failed both themself and the other person. Where did love go?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Don says:

      You put it so beautifully Linda. Would you then say that the “trying and responsibility to understand” must persist without ever reaching a point of letting go. Can it also ultimately reach the point of letting go? That’s the tension I suppose for many.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Darrel H says:

    I travelled some places on my own. I enjoyed wondering and wandering. But I did miss the companionship. I had no one to join me in a cup of coffee, or glass of wine, or a pint. 😉 now, when I go on trips with Catherine. I’m stoked to share the joy with her. 🙂


  11. “What is the extent of the responsibility to stay in a relationship where one outgrows the other?” My experience with couples who are having problems in their relationships, always have difficulty answering this question Don, especially when children are involved.

    I think we are all responsible for one another, even when we decide to do it solo, we are still affecting others. Finding the courage and strength to work together towards a common goal, has many blessings for everyone.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. josna says:

    Don, I love the way you turn an idea round in your mind’s eye and see it from different perspectives, without judgement. In fact that is the hallmark of Candid Impressions.


  13. I like this very much, Don. But I also like the flip side, that when we wait for another to ready we learn patience, and also we become open to seeing a journey with the shared vision of another.


  14. davecenker says:

    A perfect example of one thought giving birth to another. In this case, several. And although many of us look at the term relationship and immediately think of romance and husband/wife, these thoughts apply to so many different “relationships” we have in our lives – with friends, with siblings, with parents, and even with inanimate objects in some cases, like our career and financial status. Thanks for the thought-provoking insights, Don!


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